masterxehanort.livejournal.comI suggest we begin a club within this world founded on the premise of supporting our less appreciated friends, associates, life partners, apprentices, followers, stalkers, and rapidly accumulating enemies. After all, everyone deserves a little attention every now and then, yes? But I’m sure you must be asking yourself, “Master, how can I possibly recognize the less appreciated members of our fine but somewhat mixed up society?” Why, if you don’t know that, you might even be a less appreciated and possibly even nonexistent individual yourself.
So I’m here to set the record straight:
- If you’re ugly as sin, the general population doesn’t like you.
- If your hair is not luxurious or stylish, the general population doesn’t like you.
- If you’re not interested in engaging in any form of sex at any given moment for any given reason with any given person, the general population doesn’t like you.
- If you’re excessively muscular, the general population doesn’t like you. If you’re plain overweight, the general population doesn’t like you. If you're thin, trust that somewhere in some universe you are being featured in a pop music video.
- If you’re weak, the general population doesn’t like you.
- If you’re strong, the general population doesn’t like you.
- If you’re “really tan”, the general population doesn’t like you. If you think you’re getting by with that excuse, you’re delusional.
- If you’re in possession of real women’s breasts, the general population doesn’t like you.
- If you stole my boots, I don’t like you.
However, there is one very quick remedy to this sort of overwhelming unpopularity if you're not keen on group therapy and fund raisers.
That's right, my friends. You don’t need to be pretty, witty, or openly gay to win the admiration of your peers. No, you simply need a single coalescent force such as darkness (it doesn’t have to be darkness, mind you!) to destroy anyone and anything that disagrees with you. It’s the most effective form of popularity management to date. Of course, the act of eradicating every contradictory opinion may take you a few decades and by then you’ll be even less attractive than you were before so you’ll have to set out on a proper journey to do something about that only you’ll likely get saddled with an apprentice and the poor sap will superglue his helmet to his face after an incident with a razor and it’ll take over a year to pry that off.
I'd recommend just joining the club.