kingdomdressing | (no subject)

You're -- you're crying.

I'm -- sorry that you had to go through all of that, Riku. I'm sorry that part of it was because of me, too.

[The apology is sincere, but it sounds hollow even to Roxas. Being sorry doesn't change what happened in the past, and he knows this full well.]

[wipes his eyes harder, cursing, and slamming his hand into the ground]

Don't. Don't say anything okay, just shut up. I don't-

[doesn't know what to say, lashing out at the only person around, glaring up at him]

[Winces ever so slightly at Riku's glare and opens his hands out, holding them in front of himself in an appeasing manner.]

Okay. I won't say anything more.

[Just waits.]

[head jerks up abruptly, eyes a shade darker]

Do you know how to fight..?

Yes.

[Roxas is not liking the direction he thinks this is going....]

Fight me.

[stands up, summoning his weapon, then summoning Oblivion.]

Fight me!

[Roxas just stares up at him, mouth agape.]

But Riku--

[gritting his teeth; he's worth something, he has to be-has to be, even if it's just a weapon, or a tool]

He fucking lied to me!

[slams the Keyblade into the wall just next to Roxas' head]

Yes. Yes, he did.

[Oblivion slamming a hairsbreadth away from his head is a little close for comfort, but he still makes no move to defend himself.]

[voice cracks a bit]

Why aren't you fighting me, damnit.

Why do you want me to? What good will it do?

[Roxas decides that he will fight Riku if absolutely necessary, but he wants a good reason to do so first.]

[looks hopelessly lost and oddly young for a moment, fumbling for words, dismissing both his weapons and sinking down with a strangled noise]

[Crawls towards him and kneels silently beside him.]

[dead silent, shaking slightly, not sure what to do, think, say, feel, anything]

[One hand reaches up to rest on Riku's shoulder. Roxas only realizes after the fact that Riku might not appreciate being touched, especially considering that last bit of information in the notes. What they hinted at was vague, but if Vexen manipulated Riku by touching him, Roxas certainly didn't want Riku to think that he was trying to do something similar....]

[l-leans against him, gritting his teeth; he knows that it's not Vexen, and knows that this Roxas is different]

[Takes Riku's leaning against him as a positive sign, and he carefully moves his hand so that his arms is across Riku's shoulders, pulling him into a side hug of sorts.]

[doesn't hug him back, but doesn't fight either, leaning against him, his head pressed under Roxas' chin, tucking it there and just resting]

I want to hate him. [so, so quiet]

[His other arm moves seemingly of its own volition so that both of his arms are around Riku in a protective embrace. Roxas has given up trying to figure out his feelings for the moment, but he just knows that Riku needs comfort, and this is the only way he can think to give it.]

Then that makes two of us. [Spoken very quietly as well.]

[slowly, awkwardly fists a hand in Roxas' shirt, loose, curled against him. He thinks this should be more awkward than it is, but it feels oddly comforting]

I think I do. [even more quietly, voice cracking]

[Roxas just breaths slowly, taking in the feeling of having someone else so close to him. It's definitely not a familiar feeling, but it's not uncomfortable at all either.

One of his hands drop down to Riku's arm, and he gently traces a finger along one scar and then another. In the back of his mind he wonders what it was the Vexen was trying so hard to erase from Riku's memories, but Roxas wouldn't even consider asking that aloud now.]

They still hurt sometimes.

[murmurs it quietly, mostly still at this point.]

I'd wake up and taste blood, or not be able to breathe; the acid made me throw up, or have seizures if he used it too much.

They're from the acid he used, right? It made you forget things? [Roxas keeps his voice low to match Riku's.]

Yeah. I lost count of how much he used it.

[closes his eyes, the rumble of Roxas' chest vaguely, weirdly comforting]

Maybe they hurt because you're starting to remember. [Roxas guesses at this, trying to hide his concern over the fact that he's seen how difficult Riku's wounds are to heal.]

[Roxas looks down and notices that Riku's ear is right about where his heart is.]

I've finally found you -- [he hears himself whispering] -- and I'm not letting you go this time without me.