i dreamed i was dying as i so often do

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

[Axel's still in his room, on his bed. His coat and shirt were on the floor, the room was starting to feel stuffy and uncomfortable. He'd been up a few times, obvious enough by the cans of soda on the bedside table next to him that hadn't been there when Roxas had dragged him back here, half-awake and half-alive. The 'power outage' had thrown him a little, he'd felt a little vulnerable, but he knew right away when it was back. That familiar warmth was at his fingertips, he could light a flame in his hand at will again. He had the energy to do it, too, now that he'd gotten some rest.

He was sitting up, the scars on his arms and chest earlier had nearly disappeared now with his second or third X-Potion, but it wasn't really all that easy to tell. His knees were drawn up close to his chest and an arm wrapped around them. The other was resting across his knees, and he was snapping his fingers.

snap. A small flame flickered to life at his fingertips, burned the miniscule amount of energy he was willing to put towards it, and died out within a few seconds. snap. The same thing happened again.

He watched it with grim fascination each time.]

Comments

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

A promise can be easily broken and you actually nearly succeeded in killing me too. If you hadn't stopped at the last minute...

[Fiddling boredly with a lock of spiky red hair.]

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

B-but, you... I would have died, too. That would have sort of defeated the purpose...

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

Possibly. Possibly not.

[Finding absolutely nothing wrong with having the warm body pressed up against his, nor the fact that his breath is certainly tickling across exposed skin.]

You should have killed me.

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

No. [shakes his head to hide a slight shiver, goosebumps rising on his bare skin] That fight was senseless. I shouldn't have confronted you when I knew what sort of state you were in.

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

You knew? You don't know anything.

[There might have been a slight purr within those words; he moves his head so his breath falls upon the side of Axel's neck, inhaling and exhaling softly.]

Why won't you kill me?

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

I don't want to.

[his good hand is used, now to try and push Saix away.] Saix, you can't... What are you doing?

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[Allows himself to be pushed back enough to look at Axel stoically.]

Using you as a substitute like I've done before. Nothing unusual.

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

B-but... I...

If Roxas sees us...

[avoiding eye contact]

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[Can't help the smirk on his face. Can't help it.]

But what are you afraid he'll see~? [Leans in closer.]

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

This! You know what this would look like if he just walked in...

[Tries to squirm his way out from under Saix]

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

I'm sure the kid wouldn't be too mentally scarred considering what has already happened--

[--aaand squirming isn't a good idea. That is all.]

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

I can't betray him like this, Saix, I c--

... [Bad idea, indeed.]

Please, just get off.

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[C-Climbing off; cuddling he's OK with. Messing around? Sure. Anything else is usually a no go.]

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

[Yeah, that's a little better. Axel scoots away from Saix, pulling his knees back up to his chest and hugging them, pointedly looking away from Saix.]

... Sorry.

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[Certainly more comfortable. Saïx quietly sits next to him on the bed, legs crossed. Eye contact avoidance is activated.]

...

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

Y-y-you should tell him. To Hell with Roxas, you should tell him how you feel.

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[Huffs.] This again? The only thing I feel is sadness and a desire to die.

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

Dammit, Saix, [slams a fist down on the bed, it's not as effective as he wants it to be]

No. All right? No.

I don't... I don't want you to die.

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[...Leans back on his hands and looks at the ceiling.]

Why? I'm a demon who attempted to kill both you and Roxas, and I'll likely do it again.

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

[shifts uncomfortably]

I--

I don't know.

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

...

[Sighs.]

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

[Falls silent. Is it really that he doesn't know, or does he just not want to admit it?]

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[Saïx isn't sure he wants to pry anymore either way. He kicks his leg a little to distract himself, watching it.]

[foralostcause.livejournal.com]

[It's probably best that they drop the subject. Axel's really in no place to be even thinking he might have feelings for Saix, it was ridiculous. He's not only in a relationship, but he can't, as Saix pointed out, actually have feelings. Great.]

...

[lunalunasai.livejournal.com]

[Awkward silence commencing.]

...