MAN WHAT THE HELL IS THIS

[onewhowouldrule.livejournal.com]

WHAT

NO

I'M NOT PLAYING WITH THESE FAGGOTS

DO I LOOK LIKE SOME DISNEYLAND MINIMUM WAGE TOUR GUIDE

THIS IS LIKE SOME KIND OF RETARDED THEME PARK FOR REJECT CHARACTER DESIGNS

THAT DUCK HAS A FUCKING ZIPPER ON HIS HAT WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

OKAY IF I HAVE TO BE HERE THERE ARE GOING TO BE GROUND RULES

ONE: I'M VAYNE SOLIDOR AND YOU AREN'T, EVEN IF YOUR GIVEN NAME FIELD SAYS YOU'RE SOME BULLSHIT AU VERSION OF ME PLAYED BY BEN STILLER OR SOMETHING I DON'T CARE

TWO: DON'T TOUCH ME

IN FACT DON'T EVEN COME NEAR ME YOU MIGHT GIVE ME SPARKLE AIDS OR SOMETHING GOD THIS PLACE IS LIKE TWILIGHT 2: THE NOMURA CHRONICLES

THREE: YOU AREN'T FUNNY AND DON'T TRY TO BE

I BET YOUR NAME IS AXEL AND YOU THINK YOU CAN ONE UP ME BUT THAT ISN'T HAPPENING

IN MY WORLD, OUR HEARTS ARE MUSCLES, NOT METAPHORS. THAT IS WHY I AM BETTER THAN YOU, BECAUSE MY HEART IS NOT A LITTLE SPARKLY CRYSTAL THAT CAN BE TAKEN AND REINSERTED AT WILL LIKE IT'S FREE SURGERY DAY

FOLLOW THE RULES OR I WILL STAND HERE AND NOT DOING ANYTHING DIFFERENTLY BECAUSE I ALREADY KNOW YOU'RE ALL PLAYED BY LIKE EIGHT YEAR OLDS ANYWAY SO YOU PROBABLY CAN'T REMEMBER THINGS UNLESS YOU'RE HITTING THEM WITH A BLUNT OBJECT