kingdomdressing | (no subject)

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heartless

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[Kurt knew he shouldn't have taken that last left on his way back. It'd looked like a shortcut, but - well.

This corridor - wide corridor, narrow room, hard to tell - is ... cute.

Not just cute. Pastel, fluffy. An avenue of perfect little trees with perfect little apples on them leads down it, all decorated in ribbons. The walls look almost like they could be made of candy - perfect gingerbread house material. Little creatures - teddy bears, ponies, you name it - keep popping their heads out from upstairs windows. A stream winds back and forth across his track, with brilliantly yellow little ducks quacking their happy way along. And can he hear music?

For a Heartless, this is all rather ... disconcerting.
(Understatement.)]

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[it's the blind leading the blind]

Girls are just... I think it's better to just agree with most of what they say even if it doesn't make sense. You get yelled at less that way.

[Chuckling a bit-] I can say I've more things to worry about in life than if someone shouts at me.

[Such as imminent risk of stabby death 'n all.]

I dunno. Kira can get pretty screechy sometimes. And when she's really angry, her Light flares out.

Really? Well, now. There's something I don't hear every day.

[Light person getting angry? Ha.]

Just because she's full of Light, doesn't mean she didn't get my Uncle Ri's temper. She's no Princess, after all.

[He chuckles a bit.] Oh, of course.

This place is really something though. Makes me want to take my blades to it.

It's tempting, isn't it? I'd half expect the scenery to dissolve into sugar if it were destroyed.

My teeth hurt just thinking about it. I'm almost afraid of what would happen if you did try and destroy something. The results probably won't be pretty.

[paranoia ho~]

Less pretty than it already is, hm?

I mean that the cuteness might multiply in revenge. That just might kill us outright.

[Pause.]

...That might be the most hideous end I've yet considered.

See? It would be just like this place to have a trap like that. Like a Barrel Spider, but way more disgusting.

[Hey, some of his best friends are Barrel Spiders. Or would be. Two arms get folded at that one.]

It's simply their habitat. Although deception as a whole? Hah. Yes.

[he doesn't mind Barrel Spiders either, they're fun to bash for stuff]

Right. So maybe you take a whack at one of those trees, and then suddenly you're buried in fluffy bunnies. Or kittens. Or maybe you get turned into a kitten.

[A hiss-]

The thought's unbearable.

Better to be safe than sorry. No matter how much I wanna set this place on fire.

[He gives a vicious nod.] It'd be better to be through here as quickly as possible, then, I would say.

Right. It might start raining puppies or something.

[And with a chuckle, head cast down so as to avoid the worst of the adorable atrocities around them, he's heading onwards and through.]

How did you even find this place anyway?

[hurrying along right beside Kurt, looking around in horrified fascination]

Accident. Pure accident. I had thought it was a potential new shortcut home that I'd yet to see - however, I rather wish I hadn't seen it.

Uh huh. I bet you did something to bring down the DR's wrath.

[he's joking, mostly]

[He guesses as much, but -]

Hah! And is it so sensitive all of a sudden?

Who knows? Maybe it's a girl. They have shifty moods all the time from what I've seen.